Did the end of that game really happen? Was I magically transported back into the 1970s? Well, obviously I wasn't sent there because then the Flyers might have actually won something important, but come on now, what the fuck was even going on during the end of this game?
Though, like the news or Entertainment Tonight, that's going to be just a tease and I'm not going to talk about that first. Don't you fucking scroll down you fucking cheaters! Before we can even begin to talk about the end, we have to talk about the sweet, sweet happenings at the beginning of the game. Sometimes, all the time if I had my way, there is a fight in the beginning of the game to get the crowd going and the teams into it. I won't lie, there's probably no need for a fight to get the fans into a game between Pittsburgh and Philadelphia, but I like seeing them anyway because it sets a nice tone of toleration if it's the heavyweights doing it. So, who would it be? Rupp and Asham? They fought last year in a very awkward fight where Rupp had his back to Asham by the end some how. Godard and Cote? They've been known to fight once or twice I think...maybe. I must admit I was truly looking forward to Godard going against Cote again because he always seems to get the best of him. Seems I'll just have to wait for Orr and the Maple Leafs on Saturday because this happened...
Fuck yeah, Craig Adams! Wait...what? Alright, sure, Craig Adams dropping the gloves isn't exactly like Alexander Semin dropping the gloves, but consider me still pleasantly surprised. Going against Ian Laperriere isn't no walk in the park either and I'm pretty proud of Adams. I found it amusing that after a fight during the Washington game, the Versus announcers made a point to discuss how Laperriere stated he would no longer be apart of "Show Fights." Now, maybe I'm just missing the definition, but that looks like a show fight to me. Early in the game, off the faceoff? All signs point to yes. Not that I'm complaining, I think show fights, even between heavyweights, have their place in the game personally. Adams getting the draw, perhaps win because he body slammed Laperriere and ended up on top, really was good for the Penguins early on. It wasn't a dominating victory to get the Flyer fans back into the game after Malkin silenced them early on, and Godard and Rupp were still left on the bench to continue to watch the flock.
Craig Adams played a pretty fantastic game in general. His booming hits in the corners lead to chances and a goal and he laid some serious boom on Chris Pronger in the corner. Anybody that lays some serious boom on that cheap shotting coward is alright in my book. But, as I said, more on that later. NO SCROLLING!
Before we get to the very end, I want to give you guys a reason to fight. The Flyer Faithful (You know, when they're not booing their own team), consider themselves to be the most intimidating fans in hockey. That's probably true, mostly because they have a pack mentality. It's really easy to have a big pair when you know there are way more people on your side than on the side you're going to attack. Corner one of these pukes, and I bet they pee their pants faster than Scottie Hartnell will the next time these two teams meet. But...again, more on that in a moment. We've all heard the horrorible (stupid), things Flyer fans have done; spitting on kids, calling them names, stabbing each other, you know, the classics. I'm all for chewing out another fan, but when it comes to children, you're a joke. No, you're not even a joke, you're scum. So, in light of that, I give you this champion:
I'd go to war for that kid. Probably there with his mom or dad in enemy territory, probably dealing with every drunken scumbag in the arena but still rocking the Penguins merchandise. Take note, that kid's a fan and is about to knock the crap outta them chicken tenders.
This kid got a classic lesson in message sending, and I hope he was paying attention because it will be on the exam. We come, at last, to the end of the game.
The Flyers had made it interesting in the final minute of the game, Jeff Carter rifling a puck past Fleury and giving the Flyers a chance to tie with about forty seconds remaining. Pull the goalie and try to grind out a goal right? That's what normal hockey teams do, right? It's just too bad the Flyers aren't a normal team. Here's a picture of what you're supposed to when you're skating towards the goalie.
I'll take a moment to let you all get your giggles out after seeing Richards' face in this picture. Seriously, what are you even doing? Anyway...Richards does the correct thing here. Don't check the goalie, one of the biggest Cardinal Rules of hockey; as you can see with Richards skates spraying, he's trying to stop and doesn't. Good on ya, Captain Leadership, you're not a total toolbox. Wait, I spoke too soon. Remember that whole, trying to tie the game bit? Yeah, the Flyers just decided to throw that out and cause some chaos. Mike Richards runs Marc-Andre Fleury and then fakes an injury so he can get away with it, Kris Letang and Scottie Hartnell get tangled up...Kris Letang comes out bleeding? What the fuck is even happening?
First of all, just an absolutely great showing of class by Captain Mike Richards, really, bravo. With the puck in the corner you run at the Pittsburgh goalie and try to take him out. To top it off, you fake an injury after you bang off the crossbar so you don't have to answer for your actions. Part of me...OK, all of me, wishes Richards would have injured himself for such a stupid, arrogant play. Really though, this becomes just background, what the FUCK is Hartnell doing?
Scott Hartnell is a lot of things: Bad Shootout Participant, Good Temper Tantrum Thrower, Bad Fighter, Malachai impersonator, but what I really thought he'd never be was a biter. I guess this is really my fault, I should always expect the Flyers to force me to sink my expectations lower. Scott Hartnell BITES Kris Letang's bare hand! You've got to be fucking kidding.
To top it all off, Chris Pronger and all his glorious cowardice gets a hold of Chris Kunitz from behind and has his hands around his throat. Really? We're going to add choking to the game as well? I guess that's fair, if you're going to go all in, you're going to go all in. What is the funny part about this though is that after Pronger lets up on Kunitz' throat, Kunitz turns around ready to throw them. A little tale of the tape shows that Kunitz gives up six inches to Pronger and Pronger still doesn't start throwing them. Truly Pronger, I thought it was bad when you let Parros clean up your messes, but now you won't even fight a guy six inches shorter than you in a fair fight? You'll strangle him though it seems...
All that's really left to say is December 15th. Scott Hartnell, since I really consider you to be the worst transgression of this scrum with biting someone, I'll bet you'll find yourself meeting Eric Godard or Mike Rupp real early in that game. Here's a friendly reminder:
It'll almost be like an anniversary for you Hartnell! That was December 13th last year. I hope Godard remembers to get you a present. There will be blood.